How Dating a Married Man Has Made Me a Better Wife

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33 Responses

  1. I agree. Saw some friends last week who are in a position of looking at each other asking “how we’d get here?” They’re kids are grown and out of the house. As much as I have complained over the years about the cost of going on a date ( especially when the kids were little and sitters were involved), my husband still dates me. I am thankful for his attitude.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Sheila!
      I am thankful my Hubs does the same or I plan a date night. I love taking turns planning a date night and I love Groupon. It makes for some very fun, but inexpensive dates. It is so healthy for the kids to know that moms and dads need time alone too! Thanks for sharing!

  2. Andrea says:

    I would be very nervous doing that – I don’t know if I could do it

  3. Susan says:

    wise words, thank you for sharing! I wonder how many divorces would have been avoided if couples made it a priority to date their spouse to keep the relationship and romance alive. I hope everyone who reads this takes it to heart!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Susan!
      I writing from my past mistakes in hopes of helping others avoid that hole. I hope they take it to heart and realize that second chances are a way of putting the past behind and learning that love is a life lesson we are constantly learning from. Can I say I miss you already? Love you Susan

  4. Andrea says:

    Sometimes it’s good to “date” your spouse every once in a while 🙂

  5. Toni Ryan says:

    I’m so glad it’s Dave you are dating! Ha!

    I’d also like to point out how many women get frustrated with their men not initiating an actual date night. My response is always the same; it’s not his gift, so make it yours. Not all men know how to keep the love alive, so if it’s important to us, let’s take on the responsibility. My sweetheart is always happy to go along, and he admits he’s not the best at planning. As long as the end result is lots of fun and love it really doesn’t matter who does the planning.

    Love you Sheila!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Toni!
      I’m glad we are dating too! I love your insight about taking the responsibility. It is so true. We need to focus on each other strengths mor than we do our weaknesses. When each of us use our strength everybody wins! Love you Toni!

  6. Sheri says:

    Yes this is so true. I love how you got the attention you needed at the beginning then explained it so well. All the points you touched on are so right and so true. We need to continue daily to cultivate our marriage in order for it to last and succeed. Loved reading this. Flirting with my hubby is still so much fun! *Blush*
    xoxo Sheri –

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Thanks for your encouragement! Love needs to watered and cared for daily to grow and stand strong against the elements of this world. It is fun to flirt with our husbands and we both appreciate it! Happy dating!

  7. Sue A. Marsh says:

    Dating our husbands is an absolute must to a healthy marriage. Dave and I have been married nearly 35 years and we go on a date every Thursday night. We have to. We need that time together. We crave for time alone away from work, home and responsibilities. Thank you Sheila for writing truth and beauty.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Sue! I don’t know how it can be 35 years when you only look 25! The things I have learned from my past is this very truth. When we don’t make each other a priority the walls come tumbling down. Thanks for sharing your truth and leading others! So where is date night tonight? I appreciate and love you sister!

  8. Tonya says:

    What a great article that shows how to keep a marriage alive. I must admit I had another feeling when I read your title, but this is so refreshing to see, especially in this day and time!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Tonya! Isn’t is funny we tend to assume the worst because of the world we live in! I’m glad you read my post and were encouraged. Love is such a special gift and as married couples, it is so important to treasure what we have.

  9. Julia says:

    Dating your spouse is a must! You’re so right that it doesn’t have to cost a dime! The more you date your spouse the more you know him/her and are able to come up with ideas that don’t cost anything. So in reality, it should be much easier to date the longer you are together. For some reason though our society doesn’t encourage it. Thank you for this wonderful reminder!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Julia!
      You are so right! Our society makes us believe we are selfish if we don’t always put the kids first. However, I believe a family is much healthier when they can see parents who are strong together and who love one another.

  10. Haha! Great title! I can see how easily this can happen, for sure — so many things to get done in a day, right? Love your suggestions here!

  11. Thank you for sharing this post because I needed a little push to start making more time for my husband. The kids really do take a good chunk of my energy throughout the day, and throw in freelance work… it’s a recipe for disaster.

    We’ve been doing our best to make time for each other at night, catching up on our shows and having dinner together. He has two days off next week, so I’ll be planning a trip for just the two of us.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Fatima!
      I’m glad this post has encouraged you to keep pursuing and making time for your husband. I hope you enjoyed your trip away for just the two of you! It is hard to keep everything balanced, but as spouses, we need each other.

  12. I saw the title of this post and HAD to stop and read it. I was a little concerned at first, Hahaha!! But I agree. Dating doesn’t end at marriage. It should continue. We should be finding ways to make time and have intimate conversations and communication in our marriage just like we did when we were pursuing our spouses.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Lo!
      Exactly! The chase should never be over as we need to express love every day! It is hard work, but a blessing to keep pursuing!

  13. Tara says:

    That really is a great title. And the point that you are not married to your kids is spot on. I have to be careful to not unintentionally put my kids first.

  14. CourtneyLynne says:

    Haha catchy title indeed!!! It’s so important to date your spouse. I feel so many marriages fail
    Because people just give up the passion part of the relationship

  15. Maya says:

    Haha you got me in the beginning! Glad you clarified that..such great tips!

  16. Maria Hass says:

    I love this! We need to date our spouses. I know it can be pricey but there are ways to make it cheaper! Do you have a friend who needs date time too? Swap babysitting nights once a month. Go on a picnic and hike and pack your own meals. Catch the movie at the discount theater or go to a matinee. When we go for a long time without a date, my husband will even take three days off work and get a hotel room in town. It’s worth the time.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Maria! I love your idea! Fortunately, I have adult children, but this is a wonderful idea for others to look into doing. It doesn’t matter how old we become we all need to date our spouse. Good for you in doing it!

  17. Chelsey says:

    I love this! We try to make sure to make time for just us regularly. This is a great post. Thank you

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Chelsey!
      You will never regret making time for each other. It is a reward that keeps paying dividends!

  18. I know that I have heard from so many people that its important to continue dating with. your spouse after marriage because it helps you connect. I wish I could have done that while married. I will not make the same mistake again.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi David,
      I learned from my past and it has made me a better wife. I don’t want to get caught making the same mistake twice either 🙂 Thanks for sharing!

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