Helpful Advice Every Parent of a Teenager Needs

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30 Responses

  1. Toni Ryan says:

    Excellent information Sheila! You are spot on with how much our teens need us. I felt the same way when my son was growing up. He needed me when he was little, but I knew he needed me just as much when he was in his teenage years, just for different reasons.

    And to your hair color point. I did the coloring! Other’s thought I was nuts, but it’s something my son still remembers. We had fun with his hair color experiments. It was, indeed, just a faze. But one I look back on with fondness.

    God bless you, sweet friend!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Toni!
      I love that you did the coloring! I look back on those years with great fondness too. It was hard work, but so worth the effort to see who are kids have become today! God Bless you too!

  2. Char says:

    Great counsel. It is so important to keep the conversation open and laugh alot. They need to see us enjoying them and enjoying life. Thanks for sharing!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Char!
      Thank You for sharing! I agree communication is so important and the ability to laugh at each other in love. I always told my daughter “You have to understand I have never been the mother of a 16-year-old give me the same grace I give you.”

  3. Candice says:

    This is so good! I too feel like my teens need me more now than they ever have! Parenting teens is just as hard (just hard different) as when they were little and depended on me for everything. I love having teens though!!! I’m sharing this post! Thank you!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Candice!
      Thank You so much for sharing! I loved it when my daughter was a teen too. We both learned many things from each other. I agree it is just as hard and sometimes I think harder only because we have more influence when they are little and those teenagers have a mind of their own . 🙂 I appreciate your encouragement!

  4. Andrea says:

    A LOT of great advice for parents of teens! I wish my mom coulda seen it when i was a teen all those years ago

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Andrea!
      Thanks for your encouragement! Parents of teenage parents need to be encouraged along the way. If we can teach each other, then we have done well!

  5. How insightful! As a Mom to a brand new teenager, I will definitely take your advice. I’m going to check out that book, as well! Thank you!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Shannon! Thanks for your kind words! I loved the teenage years, and it was growth for both of us. You will experience many firsts, but enjoy this special time with your teen. It truly does go fast! I’m glad you are checking out the book it was a great focus for me to keep praying for my teenager. Blessings!

  6. Alice Mills says:

    Having raised eight teenagers, I would add that we must go after their hearts first. We must make them secure in our affection. I also had a rule which was if they confessed something, I would not punish them. People think they would take advantage of it. This did not prove true to me. It taught them not to be afraid to tell me the truth when they were in trouble.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Alice! Thanks for sharing your great insight! It is true I always said if you did something wrong I want to hear it from you and you won’t be punished. It was never taken advantage of with me either. Fear does many things especially to teens, and they need to know they are loved unconditionally. Congrats on raising eight teenagers! What a blessing!

  7. Erin says:

    I am so thankful that I experienced a lot and went through a lot of hell on my own. I am thankful because, since then, I have been able to use it to keep my daughter safe. We have always had an open dialogue and talked about how to avoid pitfalls. Now she is 20 and on her way to be a pharmacist. I can only pray that life goes as smoothly for my five-year-old boy. All of the junk that we go through an experience as parents is totally worth it if I kids don’t have to go through it.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Erin! I agree with you! The things we go through in our lives are sometimes the best advice and life lessons we can teach and give to our teens. Communication is so important and what a wonderful gift you have given to your daughter. It isn’t always easy being the parent, but it is the most rewarding.Blessings to all of you!

  8. Well i do not have kids as yet but i know one day this information would be helpful. Thanks much

  9. angie says:

    I am so withit staying involved in our teens lives, going with gut feeling is our best bet. I was a parent who was present at church organizations for my teens, school programs that involved my children you name it I was there There were many teens that wished their parents were present These childreen of yesterday are now adults and still respect and I respect them as well.
    you offered some great advice, good for you
    come see us at

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Angie! I agree being involved in your teen’s life is the best thing we can do for our teens. If we aren’t participating in their lives, we put them at risk. Respect is the gift which keeps on giving! Thank You for your encouraging words.

  10. the sophia diaries says:

    I’m too young to have a child but I know that when the time comes I’m going to be pouring over these kinds of posts to figure out what kind of a mother I want to be.. thank you for sharing!!

  11. Tamara says:

    Thanks so much! You will never know dear friend how much I needed to read this today! We are just entering the high school years and praying that I remember to give my child grace when she is trying my last nerve! Thankful for wonderful Godly influences that God has put in my life! So thankful for you and your friendship! Thanking God especially today for your insight into the teenage years.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Tamara! I am so glad this helped! Yes, the teenage years can be hard, but you are an amazing mom who does an incredible job of raising a beautiful daughter. You have a strong bond and one she respects. I’m always here if you need to talk. I’m so thankful God has intertwined our lives and the sisterhood we share! Love and miss you!

  12. Tara says:

    This is great advice. I love how you said that they may need you even more than they do when they are a baby. That is true in so many ways. I have a preteen, so this was timely!

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Tara! Thank You for your compliment. I’m speaking from experience here 🙂 When they are younger, our children can be content with talking to Aunts, Uncles, Grandma, etc. However, once those teenage years start they want to talk to you, and it is important to be there for them as they begin to try to understand and make their place in the world. Our faith, influence, and love makes a huge difference.

  13. Neva says:

    Speaking as a college student who was very recently in those teenage years, this is great advice about picking your battles. My parents judiciously realized that they couldn’t control every behavior of mine that irked them, but that they should be direct and firm about real problems, and that really increased my respect for them (while also making their lives much less contentious!)

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Neva! Thanks for your sharing your insights! I love that you recognize what your parents were doing and how they made the teen years better for you! I’m sure these are life lessons you will remember for your own children one day. Blessings to you!

  14. Caroline says:

    I love how you ended it with telling them they love them. Isn’t that really what we ALL want to hear?

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Caroline! Yes, that is what we ALL want to hear! We live in a world which doesn’t demonstrate love much and all the more reason to make sure we tell our kids how much we love them. Thanks for sharing!

  15. Kristi says:

    I honestly can’t imagine being a teenager in this culture, but I need to because we have 5 little ones that will be there soon. I really appreciate what you’ve lovingly expressed in this post.

    • Sheila Rhodes says:

      Hi, Kristi! The culture is hard, but as you prepare them in life, the transition will be much easier because parenting is a job in which you are constantly learning. I have no doubts that when that time comes, you will be prepared. Each child is different, but how you love them will never change.

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